It's more and more real everyday

Our Early Intervention team came today, and Christian was in his typical happy, flirty, and SILLY mood. It was a really good visit--we talked alot about what he's hearing right now, things that we can do to continue to emphasize his communication skills, and what to expect once the hearing aids come next week.

We also talked about how I, as his Mommy was doing. I cried today trying to explain to the EI folks how I was struggling with Christian's diagnosis. I tried to explain how I want him to be a part of our hearing world, but I also don't want him to not feel a part of the deaf community either. I expressed how we wanted to be sure that Christian was exposed to other children with hearing loss, but how we also had our goal of mainstreaming him to other schools. I also reiterated how important it was to our family that Christian use spoken English as his primary form of communication, but also have ASL as a back-up second language as well. Since Christian will rely on technology for the rest of his life to communicate and hear, he'll need it.

Since we've received Christian's diagnosis, I've gone through the typical stages of grief. I finally feel like I am at the acceptance stage. Today was the first day that I referred to my son as "Deaf". Is it the term I want to be used on him? Not yet.