Time.

Time is not on my side these days. How is it almost 10pm and I haven't even thrown a load of laundry in today? Come to think of it, I haven't done a lot of things today. I have lists and lists of things that I want to get done. So many house projects, some as simple as just painting trim to the big ol' bathroom re-dos I have planned on 2 of our 3 full baths this year.

Why do I keep pretending that I am a "Stay at Home Mom". I'm never home. And the time when I am, I am actually working my part-time gig. So when IS there time to work on little projects? When is there time to clean my toilets? I spend from 2:15pm to close to 4pm everyday in the car as I go pick-up Christian from school. The 2 hour window I get when Lily naps before that time is usually spent working, showering, prepping dinner, and attempting to work a bit more. My mornings are shot---I am committed to going to the gym, so I can't complain about that. But that's just for an hour...tops, maybe 3-4 times a week. It IS my sanity. I need to find peace in all of this. However, when I look at my days, I realize that the lists keep growing and the time to do them just gets lost.

The little free time I do have (10 minutes here, 5 minutes while sitting in traffic), I spend stressing over the many things that I over committed myself to. Why am I always rushing? Why am I always multitasking? I need to stop. I need to focus. I need to weed out the things that are causing all of this stress and nonsense.

Come March, things are going to change.