Tuesday, September 1, 2009

Stressed.

*Be forewarned....this post is pretty much ALL complaints!*

You would think coming off of almost a month of vacations that I would be relaxed and ready for our busy fall. Yeah, not so much. There is SO much going on right now in our little family that is just making me hit my breaking point almost daily.

My dear friends have warned me that the terrible two's are just around the corner, and we hit them full on about 2 weeks ago. Christian has been defiant, whiny, cranky, and just flat out nasty to me almost everyday since we got back from vacation. The word "No" is non-stop. He acts out. He's not listening. He's totally regressed in potty-training. He's just a different kid. I do get some glimpses of my sweet boy here and there, but I'm beginning to think that aliens have taken over my baby boy. Seriously. I am just thankful that he's starting school next week. It couldn't come at a better time.

We're starting our "official" transition year with our pubic school system, transferring out of the Infants and Toddlers program and into the school system. Any parent who has gone through this before knows just how intense, stressful, and flat out draining this whole process is. We're looking at alternative placements for Christian (a whole post about this will follow later this week), and our county has a track record for being less than cooperative for folks who march to a different drum. Like us. I've lost a lot of sleep over this, and I know it's just the beginning.

Which brings me to researching and finding the appropriate preschool for Christian next year. We absolutely have hit our limit financially and can't continue to pay for Christian's school after this academic year. We need to find something that's more in the "car payment" range and less in the "home payment" range. While our county DOES have a DHOH program, we're not sure it's the right spot for Christian. I've been researching neighborhood preschools, conducting phone interviews, and making appointments to tour the schools. It's almost harder than applying to college.


I've just about hit my limit with trying to be everything to everyone. I feel so lucky to be able to stay at home with my children, but I also work from home 15-20 hours per week. In addition to all the general "kid" stuff like balancing a toddler and 7 month old, Christian's therapy time and preschool commitments have completely overwhelmed me. Sometimes I wish I could just go into an office and forget about all that so I could be productive at work. I'm not sure how much longer I can handle this. Our family really benefits from my income, and as long as Christian is in his fancy-schmancy school....we need it.

So, like all other Moms this time of year, I'm stressed. I have SO much on my plate not just as Christian and Lily's Mommy, but as Christian's advocate. In addition to my make-up addiction, I needed to find something to help me de-stress, and I have taken up running. Liliana Grace's Godfather is a marathon runner (and holds the title of fastest man in our town) and helped me get my start with some recommendations on training and shoes. So, the past two days I've left before the kids have breakfast and hit the 'hood. With my iPod set to Justin Timberlake, I find myself totally spacing out and forgetting about all the things that stress me out. If nothing else, at least the last 6 pounds of baby weight will come off!

6 comments:

Jennifer said...

Running is my sanity too! I can't speak on having kids, but completely understand your exhaustion. You are awesome though and everything will work it's way out.

misha aloi brown said...

oh boy...my guess is that this is more of the terrible 3's (since he's mr. advanced :0. much worse than the 2's!! hopefully school will put an end to it - or at least give mama a break.

leah said...

Way to go with the running!

Two-and-a-half was the absolute WORST age for Matthew (we're gearing up for it with Nolan at the moment). We simply survived it- three-and-a-half is much, much, MUCH better! Four is supposed to be fabulous.

One thing that helped Matt a lot was setting a timer for what we wanted him to do. For going to the toilet, we'd set it for 40 seconds and would see if he could "beat the clock." He liked the idea of racing the timer and getting done before the "beep beep."

Hang in there, it really is a phase. We just finished it with one and aren't looking forward to it with the next one!

NaNa said...

Answer to your prayers....Send him to NaNa and PaPa's Will return him right around the time he learns to drive. We can't take that stress. Love NaNa and Papa

NaNa said...

Have the answer to your prayers...Send Christian to Camp NaNa and PaPa's .. Will return him right around the time he learns to drive. That kind of stress we don't do well. Love You Christian!!!! NaNa and PaPa xxoo

tammy said...

Oh I'm feeling your pain right now myself. Kudos to you though for picking up a great destressor (running) ... think I may need to try this. Hopefully once Christian is in school (FT this year right?) you'll be able to find more time for you. Easier said than done right? And I agree with Leah, I can't wait for Aiden to turn three and a half as he's already into EVERYTHING and is NONSTOP - one to three always was a hard stage for me. On a good note ... I can't wait to see you and Christian (and Lily) at school soon!